Is it OK for me to offer help to a woman who is struggling with her luggage?
Salsa-Now asked:
Hey this is a serious question. I am always in a dilemma whenever I see a female struggling with her luggage. Should I offer to help or not? How would I know whether she is a rampaging feminist who will get insulted if I offer to help?
Hey this is a serious question. I am always in a dilemma whenever I see a female struggling with her luggage. Should I offer to help or not? How would I know whether she is a rampaging feminist who will get insulted if I offer to help?
Its easier with guys though. I can offer to help and there is no drama involved.
So what are your thoughts?
Only help her if you plan on asking for her number. Otherwise don’t bother.
I think you should, I would. I understand about all of this femanist stuff.. but nah id always offer to help a lady with their luggage. =D.
Of course its okay!! and if she does get emotional then she is clearly a butt. I think it is very nice of you to decide to help a woman out, not many people are like that!!! Keep t up please God will Bless you.
It would be very sweet if you asked if you could help. Very gentlemanly
I think you should ask for help. If someone asked me I would be very pleased that someone noticed I was struggling but I would probably decline. If she does that you could ask again and if she says no again stop asking.
For example,
A: Do you want some help?
B: Oh thanks but I’m okay.
A: Are you sure? I can carry that if you like.
B: No it’s alright. I’m fine.
A: Alright then. Bye!
Armpit hair?
butch, lesbian appearence (short hair)??
Short and troll-like??
ugliness??
These are the unmistakable signs.
Just ask “Can I help you with that?”
If she says “yes” then help, if she declines than that’s her decision. You can’t be wrong for asking and if she is offended by your offer then she is not a feminist but a jerk and doesn’t deserve help.
I travel a lot and occasionally I will help someone on the plane get their bag up in the overhead compartment, I have never had some get offended at my offer of help.
Sure it’s ok no matter if she is a feminist or not. There is nothing wrong or abnormal about lending someone a hand if you see them struggling with something.
Sure, you have the right to offer (although I don’t see why you’d bother), but it’s no guarantee that she’ll want your help. I don’t like receiving help when it comes to heavy lifting, but I try not to be snippy about it.
I don’t know what a “rampaging feminist” is, but you never know what anyone’s reaction will be to an offer of help. Some people are grateful. Some are insulted. Some have jealous boyfriends who will beat you both to a bloody pulp. If it’s that much of a dilemma for you, it’s probably best for you to keep your distance.
If they want equal rights then let them pick up their own luggage…..
Then again if you are trying to pick up on her then go for it.
I think if you would offer this service to a man, you should be able to get away with helping a woman…especially if she is really having trouble. I know, even as feminist, I appreciate when people help me out when I need it and I would help someone in need too, man or woman.
Your heart is in the right place.
Offer your help to anyone who looks like they need it. You offer because you are a decent human being — NOT because you are sexist. Screw her if she is too stupid to understand that!
It’s nice to know that chivalry is not dead. A REAL man is always a gentleman.
I am a feminist. That does not mean I would not accept help from a gentleman when in need of assistance. I would welcome it. Being a feminist does not mean one is not a lady. Do some research!
Sure. Why would it be any different than if you saw a male struggling? I offer to help anyone that looks like they need it.
Well if she is struggling it wouldnt hurt to ask. That is very polite. =) I am quite sure they would really appreciate the offer.
If I see someone struggling, I’ll offer to help. Why does everyone have to get caught up in the gender thing? What about simple common courtesy? There’s nothing wrong with asking, “Do you need any help?” If the person goes off on you, then that’s a poor individual who has problems they personally need to deal with. Every person should be appreciative of common courtesy.
No sane person would go nuts if you simply offer.
You’re helping us by just staying away from us.
Feminists do it better! Come on, women! Aren’t you tired of all this?!
Yes, it is what you should do
Just ask. If they do get pissed (which I doubt), just leave. I open doors for women (and men) and no one has ever gotten upset with me for it, typically people say thanks. I’m sure it would be the same for helping with luggage. I mean, a man could just as easily get mad at you for asking–they could think you are trying to insult their strength and ability.
Always ask if she’s a feminist first. If she says yes, just walk away. If she says no offer to help.
If someone is clearly struggling, they’re clearly struggling. In the improbable event that some random stranger gets insulted by the question “Would you like a hand?” ….who cares? Her hands are full of difficult-to-manage luggage, so she’s not gonna deck you.
So go ahead and be nice. Most people will be nice back.
What’s mildly obnoxious, as far as I’m concerned, is when a guy is pushy and acts like it’s an affront to his manliness for me to be carrying anything at all, even when it’s easier and more convenient for me to carry my own stuff. But almost nobody does that.
In summary:
Good: “Can I help you get that giant suitcase into the trunk?”
Bad: “Here, you shouldn’t be carrying that bag of groceries. Let me. No really. People will think I’m not a gentleman if I let you carry that. Come on. Let me get it. I know it’s only bread and lettuce, but you’re a lady.”
Yes, you already asked this. it is the polite thing to do and well mannered. they will appreciate it and you shouldnt judge anyone before you meet them!!!!!!!!
no way.She might just sue you for sexual harassment,You know how women are.